the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
