The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
