I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
