My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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