The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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