I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
