I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
