Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
