i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Randomize
