I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
