When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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