Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize