btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
