She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Randomize
