please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
