She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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