wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
