Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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