You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
