Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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