he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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