Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
