Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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