got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
