why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
