Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
