so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
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