haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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