Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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