just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
