On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
My balls are so social today.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Randomize
