Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
