What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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