Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
