O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
