her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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