Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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