a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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