we're chasing vodka with high fives
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
