never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
