In the future we'll all be gay
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
