do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
