You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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