just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
