i think my tv is drunk
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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