Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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