somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Never underestimate the power of titties
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
