bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Randomize
