So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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