it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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